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Healing Relationship Suffering through the Third and Fourth Mantras
Today’s teaching introduces the third mantra, offered when someone you love is in difficulty. After practicing mindful breathing and walking to arrive “fresh and alive,” sit close and recite:
“Darling, I know you suffer. I know you suffer, and I am here for you.”
This mantra—grounded in mindfulness (smṛti), concentration (samādhi), and insight (prajñā)—immediately brings relief, simply by your full presence and acknowledgment of the other’s pain.
Next comes the fourth mantra, for when your most beloved has caused your own suffering. It goes:
“Darling, I suffer, and I want you to know it. Please help me.”
Because pride and suspicion often prevent us from seeking help, Thay illustrates its practice with the tragic Vietnamese tale of Mr. Trương and his wife, whose failure to speak their suffering led to misunderstanding, humiliation, and death. Overcoming pride and wrong perceptions through this mantra can save relationships—and lives.
