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The Cord That Connects Parents and Children
The corn seed symbolizes the stage of transformation: when it sprouts, the young plant uses the nutrients in the seed until they are depleted, and then it must draw nourishment from the earth itself. Similarly, the fetus lives thanks to the nutrients and oxygen the mother transmits through the umbilical cord; everything the mother eats, her irritations, her sorrows, can all be transmitted to the child through this invisible cord. Therefore, parents, especially expectant mothers, must be very careful with
- food and drink,
- books and television,
-
thoughts and emotions,
in order to nourish the child without transmitting “toxic substances” of the mind into the womb.
After the umbilical cord is cut, the form is of two separate beings, but the invisible connection still exists and often lasts about ten years, sometimes even longer. During this period, the nourishment provided is not only rice and food, but also love, understanding, and tolerance. Parents “lose their roots” when they sever spiritual communication, causing the child to lose their roots as well; similarly, if the child loses contact with the parents, both become adrift. The thread of communication between father and child, mother and child, is the link that maintains the lineage from ancestors to future generations.
The novel Kinfolk by Pearl Buck tells the story of four children of a Confucian scholar: the two older siblings give up their illusions and return to China to seek their roots, while the two younger ones initially chase after dreams but ultimately must also face the need to take root in their culture. The father, though eloquent about Confucian values, lives in isolation, unable to help either the Chinese or American communities, nor his own children. The story serves as a reminder not to merely speak of the Dharma, of culture, of history, but to live, to practice, to transmit wisdom and compassion into life. At Plum Village, the monastic and lay Sangha practice engaged Buddhism—“Buddhism in the world”—taking each step in mindfulness, sitting in meditation, speaking in mindfulness, nourishing mindfulness throughout the twenty-four hours, cultivating a strong river instead of a solitary drop of water. The handbook The Way Back to the Deer Park offers guidance on how to breathe, walk, sit, and keep silence to nurture happiness right at the monastery or in daily life.
