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Mindfulness and the Four Mantras of True Love
This title has been reviewed for accuracy.
Thay shares with the children in the audience that he’d love to see people wearing t-shirts that bear each of the four mantras for the practice of mindfulness. The first mantra is, “Darling, I am there for you.” This reminds us that the greatest gift we can give our beloved is presence, which we achieve through mindfulness. The second mantra is, “Darling, I know you are there, and I am very happy.” We let our beloved know we are aware of them. The third mantra—“Darling, I know you suffer. That is why I am there for you”—lets our beloved know we are aware of their suffering and want to ease it. The fourth mantra is the most difficult because it’s about asking for help from the person we feel is causing our suffering: “Darling, I suffer. Please help.”
Thay then reads and explains the first of the Buddha’s three exercises on love and identifies the four aspects of true love: loving kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity. He reads the second and third of the three exercises on love, emphasizing the importance of recognizing and partaking of nourishing joy rather than intoxicating joy. Mindfulness allows us to recognize true joy, and being in community with those practicing mindfulness enhances our joy.
Thay then explains the three characteristics of nirvana (freshness, solidity & freedom) and how it’s available to us right now if we don’t succumb to craving. He relates the story of the encounter of a young monk and a devi as described in the Samādhi Sutra. He points out that the happiness or suffering of others is our own, and deeply understanding someone is essential to truly loving them.
This is the twelfth of fifteen talks given during the Summer Opening retreat, in 1995. Thay offered this talk at the Lower Hamlet, Plum Village, France.