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Thich Nhat Hanh
· September 19, 2011
· Deer Park Monastery, United States
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Dear Thầy, dear respected trees, dear brothers, dear sisters, and dear community. I am over 50 years old, and my father is in Vietnam. Two years ago, the doctor said he had chronic kidney failure. But actually, it is quite mild. However, my father, like the person Thầy mentioned, is also depressed and withdrawn.
And because of his depression, he lost his ability to work. My mother is here, she has been here for a long time. My mother has been here for 8 years, working as a manicurist, doing manual labor to make a living. My father, because of his illness, is always thinking, always monitoring his health indicators. When one of these indicators goes up, he starts worrying about everything. My mother's job is very tiring, she has no time to relax. So I see my parents suffering, each in their own way. I advised them to practice meditation, to do yoga, but they always say they don't have time for such things. And now, how many more years do my parents have? I don't know if they will live for another 30 or 40 years.
But I don't know if, with my abilities, I can transform the thoughts that make them suffer. So for me, sometimes I feel that the only way to help my parents suffer less is to provide financial support, to support them with money. And sometimes, within me, there is a desire to become a monastic, to ordain, but then I feel that it is a very selfish act. Because if I do it, because to my mother, I am her only daughter. My father has another family, but I am the youngest, a half-sister. And so I feel that if I ordain, it would be selfish, making my parents endure hardship in their remaining years. So, dear Thầy, please show me how to repay my parents' kindness.
Because we do not have it, we are entangled, we do not have the opportunity to touch the true Dharma, to touch our own body and mind. Therefore, we do not know how to live comfortably and peacefully in the present moment. And the habit of running towards the future with worry has become a deeply ingrained habit. Now, if we want our parents to change, it is very difficult because it has become a habit. So, we must create an opportunity for our parents to see someone, two people, or three people living happily. We must let them come into contact with a person who is truly happy. There may be people who are 50, 55 years old, the age of our father, who are living temporarily happy lives. They need to see a sample of happiness, of peace.
It is very important that within a Sangha, there are people who practice and learn in such a way. Sometimes, we do not rely on a teacher to help us, but we rely on a friend. We see the path, and that is one of the things we can do. But as a child, we can be that person. We can apply the teachings of Thầy, the teachings of the Buddha, into our lives so that we do not worry, we do not suffer, and we know how to live mindfully. Then, we become the spiritual friend for our father, we become the spiritual friend for our mother. But if we worry about our father, worry about our mother, and also worry about ourselves, then we become too burdened and cannot help. Therefore, we must be that person. And if we practice with a Sangha, we have allies within the Sangha who can help us.
The anchor of liberation is right there; we must have patience, and patience is an expression, a manifestation of love. To love means we must be patient, and we know that practicing to transform ourselves is fundamental. If there is no transformation within us, if there is no peace and happiness within us, then we should not hope to help others, including our parents. Some say that ordaining is selfish, but that is not true. Those who are selfish do not ordain. To ordain means to offer one's life for the benefit of others. There are young people who face strong reactions from their parents when they decide to ordain. One mother said, "You can only ordain over my dead body." Isn't that intense?
And there was another person, after ordaining, whose parents did not speak to them for two years. But in the end, they succeeded in helping their family to transform, bringing happiness to their family, and helping countless others. So to say that ordaining is selfish is not correct.
Becoming a monastic can help many people, including one's own family. And if people do not understand and misunderstand, then it is our duty to help them understand, to show them examples. Therefore, we should not be caught in our own views and should not be caught in the views of others. We must have right view, have the correct perception. There are those who, in your situation, have been able to transcend and help their families. When Thầy was still a young boy, one day Thầy saw a Buddhist magazine on the table. On the cover, there was a drawing of the Buddha sitting, sitting on the grass, and his sitting posture was very relaxed.
The black and white drawing, and the image of the Blessed One sitting on the grass with a gentle smile, deeply impressed Thầy. From that moment, Thầy wanted to be able to sit peacefully, joyfully, and freely like that. Because around us, people worry too much. Thầy also had the chance to read in books and newspapers from a young age. In our country in the past, Buddhism was very prosperous. There were eras, like the Ly and Tran dynasties, when the kings and the people were very happy, and the country was very strong. When the Mongols invaded, we repelled them easily because the king and his subjects were united. There were periods that lasted 100 or 200 years with peace, tranquility, and happiness. We had a king who became a monk. This king was very skilled in ruling, successfully defeating the Mongols. But afterward, he abdicated the throne to his son to become a monk. He found great happiness after ordaining, living on the mountain to practice, accepting disciples, and teaching everywhere. He helped the people abandon superstitions to practice the true Dharma. This king even walked to the Champa kingdom, visited, and signed a peace treaty between the two countries.
Then the princess was given, then the monk promised the princess to the King of Champa, which was a very skillful act. And when Thầy read those stories, Thầy felt very inspired. Thầy thought, "Wow, Buddhism can help the people, help many beings, we should become monks." And at that time, Thầy was very eager to read sutras, read newspapers, and so on. And when Thầy turned 16, that dream came true, as Thầy's parents allowed Thầy to ordain, it was such a joy. The time spent practicing and being a novice monk, being a young novice at Tu Hieu Temple in Hue, was a very happy time. There were many other young novices to play with, it was very joyful.
And then, a few years later, Thầy was sent to the Buddhist Institute to study. At that time, Thầy's knowledge of Buddhism was still limited, but the aspiration to practice was very strong, and there was a firm belief that even though Thầy did not yet know how to practice or what to do, Thầy would surely find the way to practice, find the work that could bring happiness to many people, just believing like that. Our Buddhism was very old and it did not meet the needs of the young people and intellectuals. So, in the country, there was a movement to renew Buddhism, or renovate Buddhism. Thầy participated in that wholeheartedly.
And slowly, Thầy discovered new methods for practice and teaching. Because of this, Thầy has contributed to training several new generations of young monastics, both monks and nuns. Through Thầy's own research and practice, Thầy has created methods of organizing practice for young people that inspire them, enabling them to transform their suffering and pain, and to help their families and society. This approach to practice is called Engaged Buddhism.
Then Engaged Buddhism, Buddhism entering life, Buddhism engaging with the world. Thầy is one of those who initiated the movement to bring Buddhism into daily life to address the real issues of society. Issues like war, poverty, and social injustice. Collaborating with young monks, nuns, and young Buddhists, Thầy established the Vạn Hạnh University. To bring Buddhism into life, we established the School of Youth for Social Service to train young people to go to rural areas, helping the poor rebuild their lives. And when the war broke out, we sought ways to help the victims of war, rebuilding villages destroyed by the conflict. It was very joyful and we continuously learned more about what is called Engaged Buddhism. When the country fell into a state of intense war, there was a need to go abroad to call on the world to lend a hand to end the war in Vietnam. When going abroad, Thầy began lecturing at Cornell University and several other universities, and churches also invited Thầy. After three months of peace activism, Thầy was not allowed to return to the homeland. It resulted in 40 years of exile abroad.
And all friends, all disciples, all of my work is in the country. And now I have to stay abroad, so Thầy began to establish the Sangha abroad, starting from France, from Italy, from England, then rebuilding the communities for practice. And we reach out, we go out, we connect with religious groups and friends outside to work together. And we began to write books in English, in French. To promote what is called engaged Buddhism, Applied Buddhism. And gradually, we were able to establish many Sanghas, that is, communities for practice around the world. In America, there are nearly a thousand such Sanghas. In France, in England, in other countries, there are Sanghas like that. And it wasn't until 40 years later that we could return to the country, and when we returned, we brought that Applied Buddhism, that engaged Buddhism to teach, and the young people in Vietnam really liked it. And in just a few years, 400 young people ordained, and many young people came to practice. There were retreats with 5,000 people coming to practice, but we only had 500. This retreat has 500. Imagine at Prajñā Monastery, there were 5,000 young people coming to practice.
They had to pitch tents, they had to sleep outdoors, but they were very happy. And the monks and nuns walked on that path in great numbers. Currently, in our world, there is a movement called the "Wake Up" movement for young Buddhists and non-Buddhists, for a healthy and more compassionate society.
Our monks and nuns have gone to universities in various countries, have called upon the youth, and have established such a community of practice, and they are doing very well. And at the end of the upcoming autumn, we will have a conference, a retreat like that organized in Thailand for the youth of the world to come and practice and spread this Applied Buddhism so that the youth can practice. To be able to create happiness in the family and in society is very joyful. Throughout Thầy's life, that aspiration, that desire to practice, has never waned; it has only grown stronger, called the bodhicitta. And Thầy thinks that in the future, if Thầy is reborn as a baby, Thầy will practice again; it is very joyful.
And Thầy very much wants other children, other young people to participate. Thầy has allowed very young people to ordain, some as young as 12 or 13 years old, called baby monks, baby nuns. Many of them have now become Dharma teachers.
So this movement, this sangha, is very joyful, and if you want to join, the sangha will open its arms to welcome you, to participate in the work that the Buddha initiated 2600 years ago and now continues with our very young and high-spirited sangha, full of energy. And wherever we go, we organize retreats to help people suffer less, reconcile with their families a lot. This is especially calling for young people to come and collaborate and participate joyfully. The sangha is a beautiful community walking the joyful path, practicing liberation, bringing peace to life. It is very joyful.
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